Addictions and Children

I have learned that addictions are genetic and that it is entirely possible for our stepson to have the same addictive personality as his blood relatives. I would have thought that after seeing as much pain and suffering that one particular family member went through that this would divert any interest in either alcohol or marijuana. While I'm fairly certain that he has not tried any of these things yet, his curiosity about them has me scared about a future that I cannot possibly control.

Over this past vacation we stayed at a family lodge where the pool room was connected to the bar and also a little arcade area. While his father and I didn't drink, we did agree to teach him how to play pool. The entire time we were there he just soaked it up like a sponge, commenting on how cool it was to be in a bar, and how he would try drinking simply because he liked the "bar atmosphere" and playing pool. Now he's decided that any restaurant where he can play pool is his favorite restaurant.

While I knew that he would probably try drinking when he was older and he would have to see for himself how he handled it, his apparent absorption into the bar scene frightened me. While I know that it is difficult for a human to learn from another's mistakes, I had hoped that he wouldn't make the same choices as his relatives.

His other comment that scared me was when he indicated that he liked the look of glass pipes and that he intended on starting a collection of them. While he didn't come out and say that he would smoke them I still don't like the idea of his even having them someday, knowing that he could get easily addicted. His dad and I tried to explain that there are plenty of items that are made from blown glass, that there are several other things that he could collect if he wanted.

While there is nothing I can do at the moment except worry about possible future warning signs of drugs and drinking, I can assist in breaking his addiction from technology. Our son has an affinity for computers, video games, iPods, etc. We limit the hours that he spends on these items simply because it becomes all he can think about or talk about when he has long exposure to them. (And he would spend 12 hours a day on them if he could.) Our latest technology debacle happened the night before basketball camp.

We put him to bed early because of the early morning the next day; but my husband had a feeling and checked on his son a half an hour later and found him playing his PSP under the covers. After having his PSP and the rest of his technologies taken away for the next week and a half we were able to observe his dependency which our son claims he doesn't have. Every time the husband and I came near the laptop to do any type of work it seemed as though our son was drawn there like a moth to a flame, just needing to soak in that artificial screen light. And we could be working on anything, things that don't normally interest him, but he would sit and stay until we asked him to leave.

While the banishment of technologies for our son would normally not allow him to be near the laptop while we worked, both the husband and I wanted to see how addictive his little personality really is. I'm not a fan of the answers I've observed; and I sincerely hope the future doesn't hold as much pain and addiction for the little guy as his relatives have experienced.