Hence, the new name for my blog. I still plan on writing what it's like to be a stepmom, but now I admittedly have a new perspective and a new appreciation about carrying the egg that sprang forth a miraculous child into this world.
My stepson now lives 2,500 miles away, it's been difficult, especially for my husband to accept. But it seems that he is now comfortable with the fact that his 14-year old son has chosen to live in Maine and spend three of his allotted eight weeks with us in the summer, the next time we'll see him is for Christmas. He is growing up and would rather spend most of his time with his friends. I also have had to detach from my stepson as part of the process.
With this detachment I also have a new attachment, my soon to be three month old son has brought exponential amounts of joy to our household, and I have a new appreciation for moms.
Ladies, I understand what it's like to stand by your man and defend his fatherly right to see his child as often as he desires, I understand what it's like to have the birth mother in some senses not quite demonized but described as being less than a quality mother. She may have hurt your spouse, but a lot of mothers love their children unconditionally and only want the best for them. And she, quite honestly, is probably a little concerned about the new woman that her ex is bringing into their children's lives. That's right, she's probably concerned about you, about your influence, your values, how fairly you will treat her children when they are with you and her ex. So, even if you don't care for the birth mother at all, try to show her a little compassion, and it will come back to you tenfold, because she will feel better about you being around her children.
